I am 59 years old-have been a paraplegic since 1981. After a divorce-4 years into the injury-tried to move on. Only had one woman sexually during that time-oral only. Four years back-I watched some gay porn. I couldn't stop watching. I missed having an erection and I could not stop watching. Last year at 58-I ended up paying a young gay escort for his service. I have blown 3 guys-every time disgust and guilt. But, I keep doing it. What has happened to my life. I'm constantly thinking of gay sex and can't stop.
I'm not gay, but feel you should not feel badly about it, regardless of your socialization. Just enjoy life. Unless you hurt someone, there is no reason to feel bad. Be careful, though, because homophobes are common. I had a bi friend once many years ago, and he was shot by someone he thought he knew. I didn't know the shooter, and didn't find out why he shot my friend.
I am a 69 year old para but am still married. In my early 40'S I found a strong interest in looking at men and at the time she/males. Could not shake the strong feelings for a man. So over the years I have had men and found the need to go down in men. STill feel that way. Can't understand it maybe because I muss having an erectiib.