I feel lousy, I'm tired, and who cares?

I don't know if I'm moaning or not, but it seems like everyone else is all bouncy and full of the joys of life, and I feel like SPLAT.

Same old, same old. Same old few threads on which people post, so coming here just takes me back to the reason I stopped posting.

Come on people, is there nothing more to this Forum than just a couple of word games, with the same people posting on them all the time?

I'm not moaning this time, even though I really do not feel good, but when I came back I honestly thought that there were more people posting.

And what happens? Same old, same old. Same old word game threads and just Tony and I posting on them.

I don't know. I honestly don't know. I tried so hard before, and in the end couldn't see the point of posting here again.

Came back when my Lexie died because I was devastated - still am - and thought that this was where I should post my feelings.

And I was welcomed back and was happy, and within a couple of weeks it's back to same old, same old.

Now what do I do? I guess I'm only posting now because of how bad I feel - if I felt well I would probably say oh to hell with them and just go off.

But I can't in all honestly say that. I thought, and still think, the world of this Forum. But what is it doing for anyone?

Look at the dates of the threads. Some of them years ago and never updated/answered.

Back to just the word games, and back to just Tony and myself.

I don't now, I honestly don't know. Do I stay or do I give up permanently this time.

Is there anybody out there who honestly wants this Forum to continue as anything but a dating/email place? Because that's what I felt it was like before, and I don't think anything has changed.

Wake up people before it's too late. Wake up and use this wonderful Forum, well, it could and should be wonderful, before it's too late.

I guess if I didn't feel so lousy I wouldn't be posting this, but I just feel so strongly that this Forum is an opportunity for, as Karl says, people who aren't AB to feel Able Here. I know I always did, but now I just feel totally wiped out.

OK so I posted the above when I was tired, felt lousy, and was a bit fed up that this wonderful Forum hadn't changed since my reasons for leaving it.

I am still of two minds as to what to do.

Do I carry on posting, albeit just on the current threads, which are word games/what's the weather like/joke for the day, or do I just say to hell with it. This isn't a Forum for people who aren't \"able here\", this is a Forum for penpals, researchers [and yes, I'm talking about the person who wanted to contact me and when I refused to accept, carried on PMing me, thanking me for accepting her invitation].

Look at the people who join, ABs who want to meet the people who are \"able here\" but not in RL. Real Life.

To be absolutely honest, I don't need this Forum. I post on various other Fora although this is the only one for people who aren't \"able here\".

But what is this Forum really for?

Not just for jokes, word games, weather etc. Surely not just for that.

There are so many boards on this Forum, but who uses them? When was the last time that YOU posted on any of the other subjects?

Please people. Look at this Forum as a whole. Not just as a way to get a penpal.

But to use this Forum as it should be used. As a message board for those of us who feel \"able here\".

Karl - I honestly don't know what else I can do to shake/wake this Forum up. I did my best and it didn't work.

I came back here because I was devastated when my little Lexie died, and I knew that at least Tony would understand. And I was welcomed back. I didn't need the death of Lexie to come back - I could have, and did, post it on various other Fora to which I belong.

But I thought that maybe someone, other than Tony, would understand how much the death of a beloved pet meant to a person who is not \"able here\". Not for sympathy - just because I thought maybe, just maybe, some other person would understand how it feels for a non AB to lose their companion of nearly 12 years.

And because I had hoped that this Forum had woken up and would have more people actually posting.

And now? What do I do? Carry on in the hope that more people join in, or just give up and say sorry Karl, but dis Forum she no woik.