You aren't being silly, getting naked with someone and having sex for the first time isn't easy for a lot of people, it can be a very nerve wracking experience!
I'm gay and my first time was with an older woman (I was 19 and she was 29, married and had 3 kids!)
I won't go into the details of how or why it happened, but I wish it hadn't and it was not an enjoyable experience, I kept my eyes closed and just concentrated on getting the job done!
My first experience with a guy happened shortly after and reaffirmed the fact that I'm gay!
However, if I knew then what I knew now, I would still be a virgin at the age of 56, I haven't had sex with anyone in almost 20 years and wish I never had, take it from someone who knows, you are not missing anything and you are better off not knowing!
But, if you really want to give it a go, make sure it is with someone you trust and feel comfortable with, don't jump into it with just anyone, because you only get to lose your virginity once and you don't want to have regrets, once it's gone, that's it, you can't get it back!
Good luck!
