Your having a laugh.

Lady counter sales rushes to back of Watchmakers shop ,crying and screaming for the manager...
Manager ... What is it Mary ???
Mary .. A Male customer walked into shop and placed his manhood on the counter..
Manager rushes to front of shop....Whats the meaning of this ???? he says
Customer ( with manhood still on counter)...I would like a couple of hands put on this please xxxx;) :whistle: :whistle: :whistle: :lol:

Naughty!!!!!!!!:lol:

Doctor was giving an elderly gentleman a full examination and at the end askes whether he had any concerns..
Old Man...Well,when I make love the first time.I get hot and sticky...But when I make love the second I get cold and clammy..
The doctor was unable to answer this query until two weeks later when the Gentlemans wife visited the surgery.....
When asked about the condition..his wife replies...Silly old sod..The first time was July and the next was January xxxx :whistle: :silly:

Why Beer is Better than Women


1. YOU CAN ENJOY A BEER ALL MONTH LONG.


2. BEER STAINS WASH OUT.


3. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WINE AND DINE BEER.


4. YOUR BEER WILL ALWAYS WAIT PATIENTLY FOR YOU IN THE CAR
WHILE YOU PLAY FOOTBALL.


5. WHEN YOUR BEER GOES FLAT, YOU TOSS IT OUT.


6. BEER IS NEVER LATE.


7. A BEER DOESN'T GET JEALOUS WHEN YOU GRAB ANOTHER BEER.


8. HANGOVERS GO AWAY.


9. BEER LABELS COME OFF WITHOUT A FIGHT.


10. WHEN YOU GO TO A BAR, YOU KNOW YOU CAN ALWAYS PICK UP A
BEER.


11. BEER NEVER HAS A HEADACHE.


12. YOU DON'T HAVE TO DRIVE A BEER HOME IN THE MORNING.


13. A BEER WON'T GET UPSET IF YOU COME HOME WITH ANOTHER BEER.


14. IF YOU POUR A BEER RIGHT, YOU'LL ALWAYS GET GOOD HEAD.


15. A BEER ALWAYS GOES DOWN EASY.


16. YOU CAN HAVE MORE THAN ONE BEER IN A NIGHT AND NOT FEEL
GUILTY.


17. YOU CAN SHARE A BEER WITH YOUR FRIENDS.


18. YOU ALWAYS KNOW YOU'RE THE FIRST ONE TO POP A BEER.


19. BEER IS ALWAYS WET.


20. BEER DOESN'T DEMAND EQUALITY.


21. YOU CAN HAVE A BEER IN PUBLIC.


22. A BEER DOESN'T CARE WHEN YOU COME.


23. A FRIGID BEER IS A GOOD BEER.


24. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WASH A BEER BEFORE IT TASTES GOOD.


25. IF YOU CHANGE BEERS YOU DON'T HAVE TO PAY ALIMONY.

I hear Karl likes his cold one!!!Sorry girls no offence!!!

Beer? Yeuch!

Give me a chilled bottle of Bolinger, anyday..

(and just for Ducky) >hic<

Five tips for a woman....
1. It is important that a man helps you around the house and has a job..
2. It is important that a man makes you laugh.
3. It is important to find a man you can count on and doesn't lie to you.
4. It is important that a man loves you and spoils you.
5. It is important that these four men don't know each other.

And what is a...Woman??? Its a Man with...Wo.... in front..........Think that says it all ( Woe betide us ) xxxxx;) :whistle:

Right battle lines declared,let war commence.

Battles of The Sexes....its a story so,so old xxxx :whistle:
Ill choose the Net as a defensive weapon xxxx and chocolate as bait xxx;) :whistle:

dark or bitter-sweet;)

suzan wrote:

dark or bitter-sweet;)

Both xxxx;)

Mmmmmmmmm Chocolate!

Why chocolate is better then men!

1.You will never be disappointed by what’s under the wrapper.
2.Chocolate never gets tired.
3.Chocolate ALWAYS satisfies.
4.Chocolate makes you feel better during PMS.
5.Chocolate is always there when you need it.

But it can't take out the trash!