What happened next

super-inflated hovered momentarily above his own body which then slapped together with his lighter spiritual part ad both made once more for the outer darkness. Melissa screamed 'blessed be he is risen again' and Bertha released the leg she was had grabbed in order to halt his balloon like ascendance to come crashing to the strawy floor with a mighty thump she being no lightweight Stinking Willie continued to gape wondering how he came to be acknowledged as a man of action. Suddenly it clicked and he launched himself at Bertha, of course, my sexual depravity that's my forte, the words sang in his mind. Melisa quickly threw a handy bucket of water over the pair, one desperate the other inert.

While this was happening Cedric took a deep breath and sat up. 'Cedric' Melissa screamed Bertha swung round knocking Willie to the floor with her arm. 'What have I missed?' Cedric said looking shocked. 'Don't ever do that to me again' Bertha said grabbing Cedric and shaking him like a ragdoll. She then held him in her arms sobbing like a baby.

William de Smythe dragged himself off the straw-strewn floor, brushed down his breeches, straightened himself to full height- 5 Foot and said to nobody in particular:" You've breached my human rights" "Get a life" said Bertha, "This is the Middle Ages. They have not been invented. And even if they had you have treated Cedric abominably; not very British at all." Will hung his head in shame(and to cover a scowl) He secretly fancied Bertha and to his chagrin, she obviously did not fancy him! How dare she, a fine upstanding knight of the realm. Meanwhile Cedric,who was secretly enjoying all the attention and milking it for all it was worth; snuggled into the ample bosom and sighed. Despite his pain and injuries, he felt loved, cherished,safe, in fact the centre of attention: "I'm worth it" he said. He wiped the straw and mud from his mouth, remembering to stick out his little pinkie, good manners he thought. The Other-worldies were confused........

'Can we get back to the task in hand' Melissa said with venom in a bad mood, the others still chatting and enjoying themselves stood to attention and turned and stared at Melissa's red angry face. 'Yes we should' Cedric said 'The clocking is ticking, Bertha pass me book' he said calmly. He flicked through the dusty pages. 'Ah ha' he smiled ''time to kick some undead arses and go home!'.

Cedric opened the book. Staring intently at particular page, he cleared his throat. "Abracadabra" he said with some gravity...

scabrous skin of toad was whispered back out of the air with some levity and nothing more happened next. The assembled crew were either thunderstruck or purple faced with anger