It,s the way you tell em

A guy is fed up with being skint and wants rid of his wife so he takes out an insurance with him a benefactor...He contacts a Hit-Man by the name of Arti and they agree £5000 for the dirty deed.However the guy only has £1 on him and tells Arti that he will pay in full once the Insurance is paid....Gives him the £1..
Arti gets his chance in ASDA Superstore the following week ...As the wife is in the clothes section,Arti strangles her...but as she is passing away the store manager gets involved...so Arti,being the consumate professional strangles him too...
All of this is caught on CCTV and before he can leave the store Arti is arrested by the police...
In the local press next day..the headline is.....ARTI CHOKES TWO for a £1 in ASDA ..... xxxxx :side: :whistle:

tonypark wrote:

A guy is fed up with being skint and wants rid of his wife so he takes out an insurance with him a benefactor...He contacts a Hit-Man by the name of Arti and they agree £5000 for the dirty deed.However the guy only has £1 on him and tells Arti that he will pay in full once the Insurance is paid....Gives him the £1..
Arti gets his chance in ASDA Superstore the following week ...As the wife is in the clothes section,Arti strangles her...but as she is passing away the store manager gets involved...so Arti,being the consumate professional strangles him too...
All of this is caught on CCTV and before he can leave the store Arti is arrested by the police...
In the local press next day..the headline is.....ARTI CHOKES TWO for a £1 in ASDA ..... xxxxx :side: :whistle:

:laugh: :lol: :lol:
brilliant tony

:lol: :lol: :lol: Ditto to that.

I thank you...Im Tony Park and Im here all week xxxx :whistle:

Breaking Football Transfer News.........

Manchester City have sold Shaun Wright-Phillips....To Madonna xxxx :lol:

Rolf Harris has done the artwork for Michael Jacksons gigs at the O2 Arena........As a thank you Jacko will be doing Two Little Boys at the end of each show xxxx :ohmy: :whistle: :silly:

A man was helping his wife pick a password for a site, he typed in MYPENIS, the message came back \"Not long enough\":whistle:

Ann Summers new vibrator is so realistic that just before the female climaxes ...it cums...farts.....goes limp....rolls over and turns itself off xxxx :whistle: :side:

Two Australians on a beach are pulling on a rope attached to a radical muslim.....A vicar passes by and says...Its good to see man helping fellow man....
First Aussie turns to other and says...The vicar might know about Christianity..but knows sod all about Shark Fishing xxxx :whistle:

I dont have a jokes at momment but enjoy the ones put up

An English couple driving towards Dublin are lost so they ask Paddy....Excuse me whats the quickest way to the City Centre???
Paddy says...Are you driving or walking ???
Couple...We are Driving.....
Paddy....Thats the quickest way xxxx :whistle:

I managed to make a fool of myself getting on the bus today.I had some shopping and was searching in my pocket for my pass, the driver gave me a ticket whilst waiting to see it.Idiot me says, hang on I will give you a quick flash(of the pass).Driver replies that's the best offer I've had this morning.I sit down quickly with a very red face.:blush: :blush:<br><br>Post edited by: Dorrie, at: 2009/04/17 17:01