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Joke of the Day
- Ivory Rose
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14 years 8 months ago #29722
by Ivory Rose
Joke of the Day was created by Ivory Rose
WHEN GRANDMA GOES TO COURT
Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they are not prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'
She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, ' Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
Lawyers should never ask a Mississippi grandma a question if they are not prepared for the answer.
In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?'
She responded, 'Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a boy, and frankly, you've been a big disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you'll never amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you.'
The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?'
She again replied, ' Why yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster, too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone, and his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes, I know him.'
The defense attorney nearly died.
The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench and, in a very quiet voice, said, 'If either of you idiots asks her if she knows me, I'll send you both to the electric chair.'
:laugh: :laugh: :laugh:
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14 years 8 months ago #29755
by ducky
Replied by ducky on topic Re:Joke of the Day
:lol:
very good Ivory Rose
very good Ivory Rose
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14 years 7 months ago #30104
by jay boy
Replied by jay boy on topic Re:Joke of the Day
hi rose do you want chat jason x:)
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14 years 7 months ago #30119
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re:Joke of the Day
Whats big, long n hard when erect and makes a woman moan like fuck ?
An ironing board.
An ironing board.
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14 years 7 months ago #30121
by simontk
Replied by simontk on topic Re:Joke of the Day
A bit riskay posting it on here but very funny.
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14 years 7 months ago #30171
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re:Joke of the Day
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox informing me that I can have sex at 65.
I'm so happy because I live at 73 so it's not far to walk home afterwards!
I'm so happy because I live at 73 so it's not far to walk home afterwards!
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