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Joke of the Day
12 years 4 months ago #44970
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re: Joke of the Day
Woke up the other morning at 6am with a wicked hang over,listening to the neighbour mowing his lawn. First reaction was to get up and throttle the c***, then I thought f*** it, he'll just have to mow around me.
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12 years 4 months ago #44977
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re: Joke of the Day
Zoo keeper says to Paddy "The Gorilla is on heat & we need someone to have sex with it. Would you consider shagging it for £4OO?" Paddy replies "I will on three conditions, 1 my family wont find out, 2 I dont have to kiss it, and 3 I need a couple of weeks to get the money together." :woohoo: :woohoo:
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12 years 4 months ago #45240
by Able_Here_Team
Replied by Able_Here_Team on topic Re: Joke of the Day
I'm sick to death of people knockin the door askin for donations. Just had one lady from the sperm bank. so did I give her a mouthful :pinch: :pinch: :pinch:
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12 years 4 months ago #45251
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re: Joke of the Day
"ITS A BOY" I shouted "A BOY, I DON'T BELIEVE IT, ITS A BOY"and with tears streaming down my face I swore I'd never visit another Thai brothel!!!
:kiss: :kiss: :kiss: :woohoo:
:kiss: :kiss: :kiss: :woohoo:
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12 years 3 months ago #45527
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re: Joke of the Day
Women often receive warnings about protecting themselves at the mall and in dark parking lots, etc. This is the first warning I have seen for men.
I wanted to pass it on in case you haven't heard about it.
A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular customers at Sainsbury’s, Tesco’s, Asda, or even Neto. This one caught me totally by surprise.
Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't
be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.
Here's how the scam works:
Two nice-looking, college-aged girls will come over to your car or truck as you are packing your purchases into your vehicle. They both start wiping
your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. (It's impossible not to look).
When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' but instead ask for a ride to McDonald's.
You agree and they climb into the vehicle. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them starts crawling all over you, while the other
one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen Mar. 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also Apr. 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, 26th &
27th, and very likely again this upcoming weekend.
So tell your friends to be careful. What a horrible way to take advantage of us older men. Warn your friends to be vigilant.
Tesco’s has wallets on sale for £2.99 each. I found even cheaper ones for £1 at the Pound Shop in Prices and bought them out in three of their stores.
Also, you never get to eat at McDonald's. I've already lost 11 pounds just running back and forth from Sainsbury’s, to Morrison’s, to Asda, Etc.
So please, send this on to all the older men that you know and warn them to be on the lookout for this scam.
(The best times are just before lunch and around 4:30 in the afternoon.)
I wanted to pass it on in case you haven't heard about it.
A 'heads up' for those men who may be regular customers at Sainsbury’s, Tesco’s, Asda, or even Neto. This one caught me totally by surprise.
Over the last month I became a victim of a clever scam while out shopping. Simply going out to get supplies has turned out to be quite traumatic. Don't
be naive enough to think it couldn't happen to you or your friends.
Here's how the scam works:
Two nice-looking, college-aged girls will come over to your car or truck as you are packing your purchases into your vehicle. They both start wiping
your windshield with a rag and Windex, with their breasts almost falling out of their skimpy T-shirts. (It's impossible not to look).
When you thank them and offer them a tip, they say 'No' but instead ask for a ride to McDonald's.
You agree and they climb into the vehicle. On the way, they start undressing. Then one of them starts crawling all over you, while the other
one steals your wallet.
I had my wallet stolen Mar. 4th, 9th, 10th, twice on the 15th, 17th, 20th, 24th, & 29th. Also Apr. 1st & 4th, twice on the 8th, 16th, 23rd, 26th &
27th, and very likely again this upcoming weekend.
So tell your friends to be careful. What a horrible way to take advantage of us older men. Warn your friends to be vigilant.
Tesco’s has wallets on sale for £2.99 each. I found even cheaper ones for £1 at the Pound Shop in Prices and bought them out in three of their stores.
Also, you never get to eat at McDonald's. I've already lost 11 pounds just running back and forth from Sainsbury’s, to Morrison’s, to Asda, Etc.
So please, send this on to all the older men that you know and warn them to be on the lookout for this scam.
(The best times are just before lunch and around 4:30 in the afternoon.)
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12 years 1 month ago #46042
by Karl
Replied by Karl on topic Re: Joke of the Day
My wife woke up with a huge smile on her face this morning i love these felt tip pens
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