JOKE OF THE DAY

Bit pathetic today -

Police station toilet stolen.....Cops have nothing to go on!

Men are like parking spots -
The good ones are taken and the rest are too small.

Sorry boys - only joking (well that is the object of this forum LOL)

A man asked his wife, "What would you most like for your birthday?"

She replied, "I'd love to be ten again."

On the morning of her birthday, he got up bright and early and they went to a theme park. He put her on every ride in the park - The Death Slide, The Screaming Loop, the Wall of Fear. She had a go on every ride there was.

She staggered out of the theme park five hours later, her head reeling and her stomach turning.

Then off to see a movie with popcorn, cola and sweets.

At last she staggered home with her husband and collapsed into bed.

Her husband leaned over and asked, "Well dear what's it like being ten again?"

One eye opened and she groaned, "Actually, honey, I meant dress size!"

A man walks into a doctor's surgery. He has a cucumber up his nose, a carrot in his left ear and a banana in his right ear.

"What's the matter with me?" he asks the doctor.

The doctor replies, "You're not eating properly!"

:laugh:

An old man was sitting on a bench in the mall when a young man came over and sat down beside him. The boy's hair was yellow, green, orange and purple. He had black makeup around his eyes. The old man just stared at him.

Finally the boy said, "What's the matter, old man, haven't you ever done anything wild in your life?"

The old man thought for a while and then answered, "Well yes actually, I have. I once got drunk and had sex with a parrot. I was just wondering whether you were my son!!"

A guy asked a girl in a library; “Do you mind if I sit beside you”?

The girl answered with a loud voice; “I DON’T WANT TO SPEND THE NIGHT
WITH YOUUU!!!”.

All the students in the library started staring at the guy and he was embarrassed. After a couple of minutes, the
girl walked quietly to the guy’s table and she told him
“I study psychology and I know what a man is thinking, I guess you felt embarrassed right?”

The guy responded with a
loud voice: “$200 JUST FOR ONE NIGHT!!!? THAT’S TOO MUCH!!!”
.
.
.
and all the people in the
library looked at the girl in shock and the guy whispered in her ears;
“I study Law and I know how to make someone feel guilty”